i wonder what your world is like
what goes on in that head
how hard it must be
to spin that web of lies
and run from side to side
trying to keep something as simple as the wind
from collapsing what you’ve tried so hard to build.
i wonder what it means
when those blue eyes cry
if it’s real
or if it’s for anyone
but yourself.
i wonder what it’s like
to hate everything
to always have that pang of fear
and sinking stomach,
and to know that it really is your fault;
to know that there’s no one else
to blame.
sometimes i wonder how it feels
to know that someone like me
is more willing to die
than to let you go
full well knowing
every lie and every sticky part of the web
that you have everything caught in.
i wonder
when you’ll bite into my neck and
bleed me dry,
because you know i’m not even struggling to be free anymore.